My Wife is Having an Affair – What Do I Do?
This is a quick reference guide for those husbands who have just found out, or are going through the process of confronting their wife about an affair.
What Happens After the Affair is Outed?
Anger, Frustration, Regret, Hurt… Basically a lot of emotions are going to be running through you
After the event some parts of life go on as normal. Some parts completely stop, and it's these parts that are going to cause you some issues…
Why Men Go To A Mess When They Confront Their Wives About Cheating…
A mistake that many men make after confronting their wife is that they don't know going in what they are going to do…
It's like they say ‘I know you're cheating… now what are YOU going to do about it..'
It is HER mess, but YOU have to clean it up
And that starts with strong leadership from you
If you don't have strong leadership, when she throw's a whole bunch of emotions at you, your not going to know what to do…
It is not uncommon for cheating wives to blame their husbands for the cheating… and sometimes even for finding out!
Then even though she has cheated, the husband is the one being held hostage in his own home by his own marriage
And it's tough to say but he has nobody to blame but himself
He doesn't have a plan, he doesn't stand for anything so she doesn't respect him and he gets treated like rubbish
Some wives go on thinking that they are cheating for the good of their marriage!
So whatever you do you need to have a plan
What Do I Do Now?
If you have already confronted your wife, and you feel in this state of shock and hesitation then ask yourself…
What would you tell your friends to do in your situation?
The answer to that question tends to be more cut and dry
Deciding what to do can become complicated, especially when you share a home, mortgage, investments, kids, posessions etc.
But this decision goes above all that, this goes down to you as a person, and you really need some time to think about it and make it.
If you haven't yet confronted your wife, think about what is going to happen after you confront her and your suspicions are proved true
Do you want to stay?
Are you going to leave?
Under what circumstances will you stay?
Under what circumstances will you leave?
Is there any time frame for this?
Are you prepared to take legal action?
Why I Recommend Leaving
To keep it short and simple, basically it's easier
I really respect guys who have been cheated on and stay with their wife and get there shit together I do… because it would be so hard to do
Dealing with the resentment, learning to be intimate with your wife again after she was with another man, along with all the trust and respect issues
Although it sounds like the easy way out, it is generally the best way out
And if we look on the bright side, there are plenty of women out there, new experiences to be had and you have a lot of life yet to live!
Also the right new woman can help you get over your bad marriage and have some fun along the way 🙂
Why Do Some Women Seem to Come Out on Top After Cheating?
Many men who have been married for a while have seen their friends less and less and most likely lost a few of them
And they don't know what they would do with out their wife
She becomes his one and only support network
He tells her everything and confides in her, while she keeps all her friends and has support networks all over the place…
So even though she has cheated, the husband is the one who is held hostage in his own home by his own wife
Because he doesn't know what to do, who to turn to, so the advice he is getting is poor
Don't Let This Happen to You
You need to stand for something no matter what it costs, even your marriage
Otherwise she wont respect you and then the relationship has gone anyhow
If you do want to get back together with your wife then you need a plan
[button link=”https://anhonestapproach.com/Wife-Caught-Cheating”]Professional Advice For Husbands[/button]
As far as plans go, this is what I recommend
And I strongly recommend it to anyone who has not yet confronted their wife, as well as husbands who find themselves in a state of hesitation after the confrontation
Even if you plan on leaving, it is important to have a plan, and this is one you can use too.
Thanks for reading
If you have any comments, queries or constructive criticisms or you just want to talk to someone then say hi via the contact page
Thanks for reading my post ‘My Wife is Having an Affair – What Do I Do?'
P.S – Adultery in the Western World is not an offence, however if you would like to know more legal definitions… try here